Comparison Is The Thief of Joy
May 4, 2023— 2:10 pm
When the idea of body image and comparison comes to mind, a lot of people, including myself, tend to think negatively about it. Body image is defined as the combination of the thoughts and feelings that you have about your body. As we are living in the 21st century, body image has been something that we as humans are more aware of now than ever before.
Growing up in the 2000s– The one thing I can clearly recall is social media being around. I remember getting my first iPad for Christmas in 2012 and downloading Instagram for the first time like it was yesterday. Following all of my friends and family members on it, as well as some famous people that I had heard of at the time. But little did I know that having Instagram that early on would cause a lot of damage later on in my life.
In February 2023, the American Psychological Association posted an article about social media and its effect on one’s body image. Gary Goldfield, Ph.D. of Children’s Hospital of Eastern Ontario research institute stated, “Adolescence is a vulnerable period for the development of body image issues, eating disorders, and mental illness. Youth are spending, on average, between six to eight hours per day on screens, much of it on social media. Social media can expose users to hundreds or even thousands of images and photos every day, including those of celebrities and fashion or fitness models, which we know leads to an internalization of beauty ideals that are unattainable for almost everyone, resulting in greater dissatisfaction with body weight and shape.”
For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been one to compare myself to others on social media. Whether that’s Instagram, TikTok, VSCO, you name it. But over the years, I have come to the realization that social media as a whole is mostly fake. People are only posting what they want others to see and not their true authentic selves. People are editing themselves to hide their beautiful, and natural bodies that they were blessed with at birth. In an experimental study, Brown and Tiggemann found that exposure to Instagram images that depict attractive and thin celebrities and peers was associated with higher body dissatisfaction levels. People are showing their whereabouts in certain locations because they are afraid of what people might think if they knew what they were truly up to. It’s portraying the completely wrong idea of what that person is truly doing. Which leads their followers to think differently about themselves and their lives in many ways than just one.
Being a girl in today’s society is tough, in my opinion. Now that there are so many ways to change up your appearance whether it’s physically or digitally via social media, it’s hard to tell what’s truly authentic. But I’ve come to realize that it’s so important to not compare yourself to everyone else’s highlight reel, and what they are showing virtually because nobody’s appearance or life on social media is that perfect 100% of the time. The truth is that we are all different and unique in our own special ways whether we like to admit it or not.
So God created mankind in his own image,
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.
(Genesis 1:27)
When it comes to the concept of comparison, social comparison theory is defined as the idea that individuals determine their own social and personal worth based on how they stack up against others. My thing in the past has been to compare my life and its timeline to others. I have been completing my education path at a slower rate than other people my age and I have been extremely hard on myself for it. After graduating high school I went the community college route to truly find out what it was I wanted to do with my life. The year 2020 is when it all changed for me. Moving school completely online at the start of Covid was hard for me and it was something I was not used to one bit. I took some time off from school as well as taking fewer classes than a “full load” which eventually led me to be behind. Today as a 22-year-old. My life is still not on that standard “timeline” that we are made aware of in high school. Seeing people I grew up going to school with graduating college this year has been difficult for me because I am not done with my education just yet. My lovely friend, more like a sister, Catherine has always emphasized, “You are on your own timing, and you are exactly where you need to be at this very moment.” I have heard her say something along those lines plenty of times, even my own phone case says it to remind me every day. I have had those words embedded in my brain ever since the first time I heard her say it.
I have come to terms with myself and understand that I am unique, beautiful, and right where I’m supposed to be. I also tend to not worry or compare myself to others as much anymore. What makes me beautiful is what’s on the inside, most importantly, as well as what I look like on the outside. Each and every person is different in their own way. Someone once told me, “God never made two people the same, even identical twins.” Growing through many obstacles when it comes to social media or even life in general, I have to constantly remind myself to focus on what I’m doing, what my path is like, how God created me, and to focus on watering my own grass than to waste my time and energy worrying about someone else or their path in life.
I know that I am not alone in these thoughts regarding body image and comparison. Just know that we are all doing the best we can in this journey called life.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” - Theodore Roosevelt